Ginormous

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary adds new words on a yearly-basis. The reference gurus keep their collective ears to the streets, listening to what people are talking about. Depending on usage, any mess of letters can be strung together to form a legitimate newborn baby word. One of this year's newbies is "ginormous". Who knows if "gigantic" and "enormous" were in a loving relationship, were having casual word-sex, or just had a drunken one-night word-fling. But the consequence of their actions will linger for as long as mouths can talk. It makes sense to acknowledge words we actually use. I know I say, "ginormous" a lot more often than I say (hurries to "Word of the Day" e-mail) "betimes". Betimes? An adverb? It means "Early; in good time; before it is late"? Screw that. I like my words like I like my bacon burgers, big and smothered with cheddar cheese.

The legitimization of "ginormous" has endless possibilities. No longer will it be burdened by colloquial usage. Instead of suffering through the trap of careless word-users recklessly dragging it's word-reputation through the adjective-laced mud with sentences like, "Dude, that chick's rack is ginormous," it can now live out its destiny in the scholarly world. At last, "ginormous" has some cred. Imagine sentences like, "Faith in the democratic process has taken a ginormous decline, as mud-slinging politics prevails over genuine ideas."

I for one will not be phased by Google, who is still busting out the dreaded red, dashed underline when I type "ginormous" in an e-mail. I have the dictionary on my side, and I've been looking up words in the dictionary a hell of a lot longer than I've been googling things.

Side-note: I'm not mad at you, Google. We can still hang out.